


With Time You'll Talk

by OnceABlueMoon



Series: Dimes & Dreams [3]
Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Catra (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Catra Has Issues (She-Ra), F/F, Girls Kissing, Late Night Conversations, Making Up, POV Catra (She-Ra), Podfic Welcome, Pouncing, Some conversations need to be had, The conversation about the horde is one of them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:21:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25954405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnceABlueMoon/pseuds/OnceABlueMoon
Summary: Two conversations on a spaceship, one too early to be had, the other right on time.‘’The Horde created the two best strategists on Etheria.’’It takes Adora a second to process before she snorts. ‘’Well, at least it did one thing right.’’Catra does snarl at that, teeth exposed, claws in the mattress, tail dangerously sweeping from side to side. ‘’You don’t get to say athingabout the Horde.’’‘’I kinda have to, during strategy meetings,’’ Adora says, a little awkwardly but full of bravado Catradefinitely does not like.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Series: Dimes & Dreams [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1861579
Kudos: 99





	With Time You'll Talk

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AlessaJess](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlessaJess/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I don't own She-Ra.

Sleeping on the same bed as Adora on the space ship is… Strange. On one hand, it reminds Catra of when they were younger and all was right in their world. On the other, the cot is far too small to carry both of them. While Catra, to her consternation, hasn’t got much taller, Adora has, and she takes up most of the bed. Which creates a dilemma, because Catra had usually curled up at the foot of the bed as a child, but that didn’t work when there was no space and it would have felt weird by now anyway. Too much history, there, at Adora’s feet. Too much hurt and love and all kinds of things Catra doesn’t like to think about, certainly not now she’s been left so vulnerable after being rescued from Prime.

The thing, about these tender feelings in Catra's chest wrenching her heart apart, is that they've always been there. Sometimes she feels like she was born in love with Adora, which is a horrible, cruel fate, because Adora is never going to want her like she wants Adora. Catra wants to scream. But Adora's asleep on the cot beside her, and Catra can't bear to wake her up.  
  
How awful.

This whole thing is rather awful, sitting in the middle of space with the people who hated her the most, no one else around for lightyears. Catra would like to say they’re her number one enemies, but well, with how badly she messed up before? Yeah, She-Ra was never her arch-nemesis. Lately, the bitter realization that she is her own greatest enemy has been creeping up on her. It’s a punch to the gut, but even the shards of a broken mirror allow one to reflect on oneself.

She breathes in and out. Space is awful, but at least it’s not as horrible as being in Prime’s mind. And that could be a good thing…? Ugh, this whole positivity thing is already killing her. She’s not entirely sure it could be a good thing anyway- the Bright Moon kids might be very positive, but their strategy has _definitely_ been coming from Adora lately. Between Adora directing the Princess Alliance and Catra almost taking over the entire world, the Horde _has_ produced the best strategists on Etheria. She can’t help but chuckle at the thought.

‘’What’s so funny?’’

Catra startles at Adora’s sleep hoarse voice, claws popping out and hair standing straight up. But it’s just Adora, with sleep-mussed hair and too-broad shoulders, lying in the same bed like she belongs there. Catra takes a deep breath and lets the ugly thing she wanted to snarl out die in her mouth. ‘’The Horde created the two best strategists on Etheria.’’

It takes Adora a second to process before she snorts. ‘’Well, at least it did one thing right.’’

Catra does snarl at that, teeth exposed, claws in the mattress, tail dangerously sweeping from side to side. ‘’You don’t get to say a _thing_ about the Horde.’’

‘’I kinda have to, during strategy meetings,’’ Adora says, a little awkwardly but full of bravado Catra _definitely does not like._

Adora smirks. Then it’s on. Catra pounces forward, bracketing herself against Adora and moving with the force of her throw as they flip over, throwing both of them off the bed. It’s over quickly- three, maybe four punches, before Adora has her hands on Catra’s throat and Catra has her claws over Adora’s vulnerable stomach. ‘’Yield,’’ Catra hisses.

‘’Never,’’ Adora says back.

For a second, they stare at each other, nothing but the meeting of their eyes, as if trying to gaze into one another’s soul. Catra cracks a smile.

Then they burst out laughing. Falling onto the floor beside Catra, Adora lays on her back now too, facing the ceiling once more. They laugh until they’re panting.

‘’What’s Bright Moon like, really?’’ Catra asks once she’s got her breath back in her lungs where it belongs. She needs to talk about something. _They_ need to talk about something. Learning to talk to Adora again is important to her if they want to move forward. They can’t go back to what they used to be, just as they can’t stay what they are now. They’ll have to pave a new path. Their own path.

As far as conversation topics go at the moment, the Horde might be off-limits territory, but Bright Moon doesn’t have to be. The Horde is mired in betrayal, in things they know all too well and history too deep. It makes Catra feel too exposed.

But Bright Moon isn’t. Bright Moon’s just mired in propaganda for her, full of people she can’t quite get herself not to hate. At least not yet. She knows about the people. She doesn’t know much about the actual place itself.

Catra turns her head in order to be able to watch Adora’s face. The blonde wrinkles her nose. ‘’I don’t know. Soft, I guess.’’

Catra snorts. ‘’I could’ve told you that _before_ you went running off to them. All that positivity, pastels and those do-gooders. Blegh.’’

Adora laughs. ‘’Not just that! The beds are insanely soft. The first time I slept in one I thought it was trying to kill me because I kept sinking so deeply into the cushions. I ruined it entirely while trying to escape. By the time I was out, it honestly looked like you had gone to town on it with your claws, instead of me desperately trying to dig my way out with a dagger.’’ She’s silent for a bit. ‘’I didn’t like that. That it reminded me of you, I mean.’’

That hurts. Catra’s claws cut into her palm. ‘’So. Me, your dirty little secret from your dirty and dark past, huh.’’

Adora sits up. ‘’No! That wasn’t what I meant at all!’’ She reaches for Catra, but Catra feels herself go stiff in that way she always does when trying not to flinch away and she can _see_ in Adora’s eyes that she recognizes it. Adora stops. Now she looks hurt too.

Good. Catra doesn’t like being hurt alone.

Even if that kind of makes her an awful person.

‘’You were never something I considered my… what you just said. It just… It hurt because you weren’t there, amongst other reasons.’’

‘’What _other reasons.’’_

Adora throws her hands up. ‘’The Horde! My mixed feelings over the Horde and- and- I didn’t fit in with Bright Moon and I always did with you, but _you_ weren’t there!’’ Her voice gets more and more accusing as she goes on as if she wasn’t the one who left. ‘’Besides, _you_ didn’t want to talk about this in the first place!’’

‘’Well, maybe we _have to!’’_ It comes out of Catra’s mouth before she even realizes what she’s saying. Adora stares at her with wide eyes, mouth agape. Catra swallows thickly. ‘’Just- Not today. I… I want us to work on this, Adora. But I don’t think I’m ready.’’

She stands up, dusts off her knees and walks away. Adora catches her wrist. ‘’Where are you going?’’

‘’Venting with Glimmer,’’ Catra says. ‘’For a goody-two-shoes, she’s pretty good at spitting venom.’’

Adora raises her eyebrow. ‘’About me?’’

‘’If you think this is all about you, you’re definitely not ready for this conversation. I’ll see you.’’

The door closes behind her.

Catra doesn’t know what the conversation is about either. All she knows is that she isn’t ready yet, and that it’s not about Adora, but at the same time it is, and at least Glimmer will be a pretty good distraction from _feelings._

There’s a conversation there, with Adora, behind the door she just closed. Neither of them is ready yet. Catra isn’t sure they will ever be, but the alternative is possibly even worse.

* * *

Months later, in the very same spaceship but a very different place in their relationship, Catra asks a question. ‘’Don’t you miss the Horde?’’

Her gaze wanders over the silk sheets towards Adora. Their bedroom has a bigger bed now, which really is for the best. Saving the world has some perks. Better furniture is one of them. A great girlfriend another. She elbows Adora.

Adora looks at the ceiling and shrugs. ‘’I don’t know. I missed _you._ Lonnie, Rogelio and Kyle too, of course, but… Well, you know how you and I were. The world just wasn’t the same without your hand in mine.’’ She turns bright red after that admission.

Catra can’t help but smile at that, a little pink-cheeked as well. She takes Adora’s hand.

Then Adora’s face turns more serious. ‘’Do you? Miss the Horde, I mean.’’

‘’I thought- I thought I would. But I don’t think I really do.’’

Adora hums. ‘’Regret not leaving with me when I asked you to?’’ Her voice is too casual for such a loaded question and for a second it sucks all the oxygen out of Catra’s lungs.

Then she breathes again, a sudden calm coming over her at the realization. ‘’No,’’ she says.

Adora blinks. ‘’But- It’s the Horde! And look at what it ended up doing to you! I know you, Catra. That wasn’t you. I don’t know what pushed you over the edge like that but-‘’

Catra places a hand over her mouth. ‘’Stop talking. Let me speak.’’

With accusing eyes, Adora does.

‘’You leaving was perhaps the best and the worst thing that ever happened to me. I am maybe, somehow, a _little_ attached to your dumb ass, but you didn’t hear that from me, okay! It- It hurt a lot when you left. Not just for me, but for the rest too, I guess. I didn’t really bother a lot with them after you left. That might have been a mistake, maybe.

You leaving meant people were finally forced to recognize I was just as good as you were, that I was your equal in every way. That I could still beat you and your glittery, sparkly princess persona, even if you had that stupid sword. I wanted to prove myself, prove that I was better than the rest of them, that just because I came from nowhere that didn’t mean I had to remain nothing. You know me, Adora. Do I let others walk over me?’’

‘’No,’’ Adore says, voice muffled by Catra’s hand. ‘’You don’t. You never do.’’ Slightly embarrassed she forgot about her hand, Catra drops it quickly. Adora bites her lip. It’s disgustingly attractive.

‘’The problem is,’’ Catra says, moving on, eyes sharp and clear as ever, ‘’That I spiralled. Even as I made the world the Horde’s playground, forever chasing after something I didn’t know, some sort of success I wanted to reach… The more I realized what a stupid decision I had made. You see, I think my ambition was all fine and dandy. The problem is the place it went into. Not following you was the right decision, but staying chained to the Horde… I think that may have been a bad one as well.’’ Turning on her back, Catra stares up at the ceiling. ‘’I wanted to grow, but there’s no room for growth in the Horde. It’s too crowded, too stacked up in every single place. If you want to go up, you have to push down everything beneath you. Build your own foundation on the bones of others. Enemy, friend, foe, you crush them all or you’re the one who gets crushed. The Horde is no place to grow, it’s a place to _get struck down.’’_

She couldn’t properly see Adora’s reaction, the ceiling currently her best friend. She wasn’t even sure if she wanted to shift and see the pity in Adora’s eyes. It was one thing to share your life with someone, another to share your soul. She wishes she was ready, she loves Adora so much, but chains aren’t easily broken. Especially not ones forged and built upon since birth. And there was nothing she hated more than pity. Catra was the bone-crusher, not the one who _got_ crushed beneath another’s foundation. Even if Adora was the only person she’d let climb her.

‘’If not the Horde, nor with me, where would you have gone?’’ Adora’s question catches her off-guard. There’s no pity in that question, no pussy-footing around. It makes her appreciate Adora all the more. A small smile creeps up on her lips. The question is an easy one to answer.

‘’Scorpia once asked me to rule the Crimson Waste with her. That seemed like a pretty cool gig.’’

‘’…Scorpia, huh.’’

Catra frowns, turning her face towards Adora. Why wouldn’t her best friend look at her? Adora’s avoiding her eyes, keeping her own gaze trained on the ceiling. That thing seemed to be everyone’s best friend today. What’s this about? Adora never talks about people with that tone and the wrinkle in her nose is not an expression she often wears. Wait- ‘’No _way!’’_ Catra sits up, slapping Adora’s arm. ‘’You’re jealous!’’

“No- no, I’m not! And even if I were, would that be so crazy?” Adora sits up as well. "You went to the _princess ball_ together! I’d learned all the finicky rules for that damn party and then _you_ came in, looking _way_ too hot and evil in that suit with _her_ on your arm! Can’t a girl prepare for a ball without being completely blown away by– no, wait, not the point.’’ Adora, flustered by now, starts fidgeting with the sheets.

Catra laughs. ‘’You are a _total_ dumbass. Scorpia’s amazing. Treated me better than I treated her, that’s for certain. She didn’t leave me just because she found some fancy sword.” Which was worse in her own opinion, because it meant that it had been _her_ actions that drove Scorpia away. At least in Adora’s case it had been the Horde, not her own personal actions, though she had feared that possibility for quite some time. “But she’s not you, knucklehead.” Catra’s cheeks heat up as she reaches up to trail her fingers over Adora’s lips. “You’re… you. Like you’ve always been. And that’s what I want. That’s enough for me. Just… you.”

“Your fingers there make it really hard for me to concentrate right now, kitten.” Adora’s pupils darken dangerously, her eyes lidded.

Catra smirks and slowly moves her face closer to Adora’s, building the anticipation. “Well then…” She lowers her voice teasingly, loving the way Adora’s breath hitches. “Concentrate on this.” In one swift move, Catra pounces and tackles her. Adora’s arms sprawl and Catra pins them down to the mattress. Sitting on top of Adora’s hips, her tail curls around her, sweeping it’s way up Adora’s neck towards her cheek. Adora shivers, her voice strained as she speaks. “You have a strange definition of concentrating.”

Catra smirks, baring her razor-sharp canines and moves in for the kill.

Adora screaming Catra’s name was heard by everyone on the ship that day.

**Author's Note:**

> It was a tickle attack and a raspberry kiss, promise. No Adora's were harmed in the making of this fic.
> 
> [My Twitter](https://twitter.com/Bluechama)


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